Here comes the bride
all fate and wide
here comes the groom
thin as a broom
Other additions include:
see how she wobbles
from side to side
And
Here's comes the usher,
the old toilet flusher
When this hit my first grade class, we outdid each other trying to make up new verses, such as "Here comes the parson / his name's Johnny Carson," which I've gotta say was pretty good. Then there was "Here comes the loop / an old piece of poop." This absolutely slayed us, and was probably the reason I spent a few years thinking there was some functionary at weddings known as "the loop."
The parody has been going around since at least the 1960s, and appeared in one of Beverly Cleary's "Ramona" books.
Here comes the bride
ReplyDeleteFour feet wide
Stepped on a turtle
And down came her girdle!
(Thunder Bay, northwestern Ontario, 1970s)
Here comes the bride,
ReplyDeleteAll fat and wide,
Slipped on a banana skin,
and went for a ride!
South Africa, (late 1960s and 1970s)
Here comes the bride
DeleteAll dressed in white
She slipped on a banana peel
And went for a ride!
South Africa in the late 1980s
Here comes the bride,
ReplyDeleteTall, fat, and wide,
watch her as she wobbles
from side to side.
My aged babysitter sang this in MA the early 1970s.
Los Angeles, 50's - 60's
ReplyDeleteHere comes the bride
All dressed in pink
Open the window
And let out the stink!
Here comes the bride
ReplyDeleteHere comes the bride
Where is the groom?
He's in the bathroom!
Why is he there?
He's in his underwear!
Here comes the bride
ReplyDeleteAll dressed in white
Stepped on a turtle
And down came her girdle!
Bit of a mashup of some others! Heard from my southern NJ cousin in maybe the late 60s?
Here comes the bride,
ReplyDeleteFair, fat, and wide!
Here comes the groom,
Skinny as a broom!
Here comes the usher,
The old toilet flusher!
Wisconsin, 1980s
Here comes the bride
ReplyDeleteAll fat and wide
Can't fit through the front door
Has to go round the side
Cornwall, United Kingdom 2000